Rendition
by Sylver Diadem
Summary: You might not see Stridercest the same after this. ALPHA timeline in highschool! In hiding! Love! Cosplay! Awkwardness! Drama! Idea behind it all: Dave is Dirk's son! Don't burn too bad!
1. Chapter 1

_**OWNS NOTHING! Enjoy! Try not to burn TOO bad!**_

* * *

I knock on the door, curious as to why the principal wanted to see me so randomly, but staying in character. As President of the Cosplay Club, I am expected to be one Hell of a Sebastian.

"Come in!" The deep, baritone voice of the principal reaches me and I open the door.

I almost swoon when I see who's inside._** The entire Homestuck Alpha timeline!**_ Keep calm, Lucy. Be Sebastian.

"You summoned me, Sir?" I ask in a calm, cool way, bowing like Sebastian would to Ciel (who is mostly likely running around the school somewhere, dragged along by Alois). I keep my voice in a perfect, smooth male tenor.

"Lucy, this entire group is new here. I promised their guardians that you would help them out." Principal Enciso, a five-foot-eight, swimmer-built Hondurian with a Ph.D. in performing arts explains. I nod, looking to the group on my left he's gesturing to. Kankri and the other dancestors along with Dirk, Jake, Roxy, and Jane sit there. On my right are the Ancestors and the Alpha Dave, John, Rose, and Jade. _'Deep breaths, Lucy.'_

I turn to the ancestors, bowing as a butler should. "Rest assured, good Sirs and Ladies, that your children are in the utmost capable hands." I speak humbly.

"Now, Lucy, there are a few things you should know-" Mr. Enciso begins.

"Kurloz is mute, Meulin is deaf, Damara only speaks Japanese, and Mituna is mentally handicapped." I finish for him. He blinks in surprise, as does everyone else.

"So what makes you think you're qualified to take charge of our kids?" a low, rumbling growl makes me turn to face the GHB. I give a small smile, opening my mouth to assure the man, but Mr. Enciso beats me to it.

"Miss Swords is the best student in the history of Clio Academy. She is valedictorian and Class President of her class. She's on my personal student advisory board, Historian of our Student Council, President of the Cosplay Club, even a well-decorated officer in our NJROTC. And that's just in school." He pauses for a moment. When no one speaks, he continues, much to my embarrassment. "She's a world-wide martial artist, a medically CERT certified personnel, and the bet volunteer any community could want." Wow, he sounds very indignant now. I totally just wish the floor would open up and swallow me whole.

"It's fine, Mr. Enciso." I speak finally, surprised at how calm and a bit curt I sound. I allow a small smile to cross my face. "I'm sure he's just worrying a few **_bucket_**-fulls." I assure the principal, still calm. He nods in understanding, the only one in the room who isn't affected in some way by my choice of wording.

"Well, I'm sure that Lucy here has everything under control." he looks at me. "They do, for the most part, have the same schedules as each other. I've had them put into the same lunches as you." he informs me, handing me their schedules. Then he looks at the new students. "You may follow Miss Swords to your classes now." He turns to the adults. "I would like to go over a few more things with you, if it's fine."

I file out last of all the noobs. "Please allow me to introduce myself. I am Lucy Saphira Swords, but right now I'm cosplaying as Sebastian Michaelis." I speak as I go through the group,handing them their papers. "You all have classes close to each other, so that's good. And I'm not far away. If you have any problems, or need anything, just ask a teacher to call for me. I really only have four classes, so don't feel guilty about asking me to come over." I give Sebastian's winning smile. "I do believe a tour is in order, no?" I ask, a little mischievously. "I'm sure class can wait a little longer."

* * *

Lunch rolls around and I find a few of them standing in a corner awkwardly. I approach Kankri, Mituna, Meulin, and Kurloz. "Come on." I motion for them to follow with my tray. We all sit at a large circle table. Within minutes, all sixteen are here. They talk and laugh together, seeming to forget where they are. I watch such closeness and comraderie with a small smile.

"I figured I would find you here,_ Michaelis_." a cold voice comes from behind me. I turn to see Claude glowering at me spitefully.

I smile easily. "Come now, Faustus." I lean back, relaxed. "Can we not release old grudges? Ciel went off on his own a few centuries ago." I look at my black nails lazily.

Some guy walks up to me, looking flustered. Purple gills hang horribly from his neck. "Lu-er, Sebastian, I-I can't get these to stay or look natural." he looks kind of embarrassed.

"Excuse me, Faustus." I nod to the spider and walk over to Jordan, who will be cosplaying as... Cronus Ampora... next week... My eyes widen a bit as I remember next week's cosplay theme._ 'Oh, shit!'_

"Here." I have him hold the hand mirror to where he can see what I'm doing. "Move your neck, and I'll cull you." I speak sweetly, casually, but the threat is very real.

I carefully apply the glue, not waiting very long before dabbing the putty around the edges. Letting it dry, I repeat the process on the other side. "Practice speaking." I instruct calmly.

"Damn, do I have to?" he speaks like Cronus as I smooth the mostly-dry putty. "Good. Now, who's your Matesprit?" I ask calmly, applying purple eyeshadow on the putty and fading it into his skin.

"Heh. Kankri." he answers in a smug purr. I nod in approval. "Done." I announce. He blinks at the mirror. "Holy shit! They look so real!" he gasps.

"Yes, yes. Run along now." I gently shoo him away before turning back to Claude. "Terribly sorry, Faustus. You know how being so responsible is- or, at least I would hope so." I give a smug smirk.

His jaw clenches. "One shouldn't speak of responsibility so freely, considering you have left your post at your Master's side." he hisses angrily.

"Says the one who was looking to steal another's prey while ignoring his own charge." I reply coolly.

"Claude, stop it!" a high-pitched, snobbish voice reaches us. "That's enough, Sebastian." A calmer, more condescending voice follows.

Both of us turn to our respectful masters. "Young Master." I greet Ciel as Claude announces, "Your Highness."

"Ciel, why are they fighting over you again?" Alois pouts, stamping his foot. "Probably for some trivial and stupid reason." Ciel sighs like he has a headache. The brunette walks over to me and grabs my tie, pulling me down to his eye level. "What do you think you're doing?" he asks in a low, dark voice.

"No fair! Why is everyone talking with Sebastian?! Claude, I order you to fight Sebastian!" Alois yells.

Claude strikes, but we're not in that spot. I hand a cradled Ciel to the closest person, who happens to be Dirk. With that, I turn and leap into action.

We're everywhere, throwing cutlery, food, and performing some carefully choreographed hand-to-hand combat.

We end when I throw him into the fountain in the middle of the cafeteria. Everyone around me cheers.

I return to the Alphas and Ciel. "I humbly apologize for that display, My Lord. I admit, it wasn't my best." I kiss his hand as I sit.

"Oh never mind." he waves my apology off before climbing into my lap and I wrap my arms around his waist.

"Are you two together?!" Jake asks incredulously.

"What an idiotic thing to ask." Ciel answers flatly, eating his lunch. I chuckle. "What my Master means is; as a normal couple of students who attend this school as well as the anime of which we're cosplaying, no we are not. But we deemed the pairing for our cosplay." I explain Sebastian style.

Ciel looks at the sixteen others around us, then at me. "Are they a part of next week? They look a lot like the Alphas." he comments casually.

I chuckle again. "No, Young Master. They just started here today." I answer calmly.

"A pity." Ciel murmurs, not caring anymore.

"Er, Lucy?" I turn my head to Porrim. "What's a period?" she inquires curiously, a paper in front of her. _'She must have Health...'_

I blink once. "A period is the human equivalent of being in heat. Although personally, I think it's much worse." I begin nonchalantly, ignoring the discomfort of the males around us...

* * *

I sigh as I get back to me and my sister's house. Our dad had died overseas and mom is the Chief Spokesperson for GE Energy, so she's gone most of the time. We only ever see her on Christmas and maybe a random point or two in the year.

Knowing my sister won't be home for another two hours, I wander into the living room.

I'm just settling down when my cellphone rings. "Yello?" I answer the unrecognized number in my Texan drawl.

_"Lucy?"_ Cronus' voice comes from the other side.

"Howdy, Cro. Is there a problem?" I inquire politely.

_"Er, yeah... Tuna! ...** ACK!**"_ There's a lot of scuffling on the other end, then the phone cuts off. I smirk to myself at their antics.

As expected, my sister Dawn and her boyfriend Riley (who also lives in our five-bedroom house) return just as I'm setting the last of the food on the table, some country music playing softly from the radio in the corner. We sit eat, and talk about our day.

"So... the Homestuck Alphas now attend my school." I speak carefully.

Both junior high students freeze. "Y-you mean... Cronus and Horuss?" Dawn practically bounces with excitement. I nod slowly and her bouncing doubles in happiness. Riley looks like he's not sure whether to be as excited or be terrified. "And the sad part is that next week is our Homestuck cosplay." I add glumly.

Dawn and Riley burst into laughter at my predicament. I scowl at them half-heartedly.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Enjoy! No owns songs!**_

* * *

I stand at the bus ramp, waiting to greet them. "Howdy guys-!" They walk right past me. I watch them, a bit saddened, until they're inside._ 'Maybe they didn't recognize me?'_ Shrugging, I follow them in.

Mituna is on the floor, seeming to be throwing a tantrum. "Luthy! Luthy!" he yells, not unlike a spoiled child.

Wordlessly, I march right up to him, kneel, and pop him on the cheek- just hard enough to startle him.

"Now hush it. Ya look like a fool. Actin' like this is indignant and only pisses off yer friends." I speak calmly in my southern drawl. "Whinin' gets ya angry people." I continue.

"L-Luthy?" Mituna asks in a slight whimper.

"Ah'll only be Lucy if ya stop actin' so childish." I stand, offering the psiioniic my hand- which he takes hurriedly.

"Is that really you, Lucy?" Porrim asks incredulously. To that, I turn to the jade blood, smiling sheepishly. "Yeah... this is what Ah really look like." I tug nervously on a strand of my light auburn hair. "Sorry 'bout the accent. I wuz sorta born with it."

"You're so pretty!" Jane exclaims, coming forward to hold my hands. "And the dress is marvelous!" she gushes. I shift awkwardly, feeling a blush creep up my face. "Er, thank you. I made it myself." I mumble, looking down at my dress. It's an emerald green and white, gothic lolita dress.

"Your tits are huge!" Roxy grins, hugging me and smelling like a cosmo. I feel my blush get hotter.

* * *

"So what kind of music do you like?" Jane inquires between bites of food.

"Mm... Mostly country and rock, but I like ta listen ta other things." I answer absently, my left hand playing with Mituna's hair (his head is on my lap) and my right hand holds my sandwich. We all sit in the courtyard under the literal circle of birch trees.

"I love your accent." Roxy sighs. "I wish Dirk would talk with his more." she nibbles on her pizza. Dirk only shrugs, not looking up from his pre-calculus book.

"That reminds me," I perk up suddenly, getting everyone's attention, "I don't know how y'all are going to react on Monday, but I'm apologizing now. There is absolutely no way I can change it." I nod, feeling a little better.

Porrim and Kankri are the most interested. "What's happening Monday?" Kankri asks with innocent curiosity.

"I'd rather not talk about it. Just know that I am very, truly sorry." I answer gravely.

**_~ MONDAY ~_**

"Dirk!" I turn to see Jake, Roxy, and Jane approaching. _'Oh shit! Wrong group!'_ I fret mentally, hoping the real Dirk will show up soon.

"Why are you wearing that, Dirk ol' chap? That's a little... nostalgic, don't you think?" Jake asks curiously. _'Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck!'_

"Dirk!" Another English accent is my saving grace. I let out the tiniest huff of breath before turning to see my Jake.

At that moment, the Real Dirk walks in from the bus ramp.

"T-two Dirks?!" Real Jake yelps, looking between us. "Two of**_ me?!_**" he cries.

My Jake comes over and links his arm with mine. "Dirk, Dave's been looking everywhere for you, you rascal! Come along." As I'm dragged away, I mouth _'Sorry!'_ over my shoulder to the real Alphas.

We don't go far before I hear someone yell, "Bro!" I instinctively open my arms to catch a Dave shorter than me. He buries his face into my abs, "What's wrong lil' man?" I ask calmly in my best Dirk-Voice, which is pretty damn good. "Why aren't you in school?"

"Bro, we got a free day. So we all came to visit." he answers, mimicking my monotonous voice. He jabs his thumb behind him at all the Betas (who are all cosplay).

"Sure, dude." I ruffle his hair, and he grumbles half-heartedly.

"Who the bloody hell are _they_?!" We turn to see Real Jake looking flabbergasted. "A-and Mr. Strider! What are _you_ doing here?!" he cries in astonishment.

My Dave ignores Real Jake. "Bro, can I have twenty boondollars?" he asks me. "Sure, lil' man." I pull out my wallet and hand him said amount. "Thanks Bro." Dave gives me a peck on the cheek before absconding.

"What the bloody hell was that?" Real Cronus asks, bewildered.

"As professional cosplayers, we stick to cannons as much as possible. Our main cannons to follow are Dave and Karkat- aka: Davekat, Tavros and Gamzee- aka: GamTav or PB&amp;J, Cronus and Kankri- aka: Cronkri, Dirk and Jake- or Dare, Meenah and Aranea- or Les8fins, Rose and Kanaya- Rosemary, and Roxy and Jane- or Cotton Candy. Although both Dave and Jake will still flirt with Dirk, as was decided by our club." I explain, arms crossed over my flat (bound) chest.

"And who are you exactly?" Roxy peers at me.

"Dirk Strider." I answer flatly. Jake facepalms and Dirk gives me a thumbs up.

"No~!" she whines at my answer. "Who's the cosplayer?"

"Lucy Swords." I reply in the same flat tone.

"Lucy?! Why are you cosplaying as Dirk?" Porrim inquires curiously.

"Because I'm the only one who could keep a straight face." I answer. "That, and I make a hotter Dirk the anyone else in the Club." I add as an afterthought, shrugging. With that said, I move myself over to immerse into the Cosplay Alphas- both humans and trolls.

At lunch, I walk in to see my Dave sitting on Real Dirk's lap. Poor Dirk and the Real alphas look so confused.

I walk over and clear my throat loudly. Dave blinks at me, eyes widening. "D-Dirk?!" he looks between me and Real Dirk. "Okay, which one's Brobot?" he asks calmly, with just the faintest trace of hysteria.

I yank him up by his scruff. "I'll remind you of the difference." I speak with a soft growl, dragging the brighter blonde to the closest janitor's closet.

Once inside, I proceed to rattle and bang on the door furiously while 'Dave' makes very obscene moans and gasps with the occasional cry, "Bro!", and "Ah, fuck yes!" While he does this, he changes into the rumpled version of his shirt, mussing his hair and making sure his shades are slightly askew.

After ten minutes of this, I stop and all is quiet on the other side.

I open the door and Dave steps out, limping slightly, before I follow. The cafeteria fills with catcalls and hoots as Dave tries hard to keep his 'Strider Cool' face as he straightens his shades.

"No fair! We're suppose to start purrfurming!" Nepeta stamps her foot. She drags us to the stage located on the south side of the cafeteria.

"Alpha girls first!" Latula cheers, and all the Alpha timeline females file onto the stage. The rest of us Homestuckers watch silently.

_Put some lipstick on_  
_Perfume your neck and slip your high heels on_  
_Rinse and curl your hair_  
_Loosen your hips and get a dress to wear_  
_I'm the one who's_  
_Been comin' 'round lookin' lovin' you_  
_You're the medicine_  
_I need to heal the way you make me feel_

_I'm gon' be manicured_  
_You wanna be man cured_  
_Ma ma ma manicured_  
_She wanna be man cured_ **_(man-cured!)_**  
_Salon's enough for her_  
_Not to feel so insecure_  
_Ma ma ma manicure_  
_She wanna be take care'n of_  
_Can you feel it, can you feel it, can you feel it_  
_I'm addicted to the love that you garner_ **_(man-cured!)_**  
_Can you feel it, can you feel it, can you feel it_  
_Like a serial killer, man is a goner **(man-cured!)**_

_Touch me in the dark_  
_Put your hands all over my body parts_  
_Throw me on the bed_  
_Squeeze, tease me, please me, _  
_That's what I said!_  
_'Cause the, trick who's,_  
_Been comin' round lookin' lovin;' you._  
_You're the medicine,_  
_I need to heal the way, the way you make me feel~!_

_I'm gon' be manicured_  
_You wanna be man cured_  
_Ma ma ma manicured_  
_She wanna be man cured_ **_(man-cured!)_**  
_Salon's enough for her_  
_Not to feel so insecure_  
_Ma ma ma manicure_  
_She wanna be take care'n of_  
_Can you feel it, can you feel it, can you feel it_  
_I'm addicted to the love that you garner_ **_(man-cured!)_**  
_Can you feel it, can you feel it, can you feel it_  
_Like a serial killer, man is a goner **(man-cured!)**_

_Man-cured!_  
_Man-cured!_  
_Heal me, 'cause I'm addicted to love!_  
_Save me, 'cause I'm addicted love-_  
_Man-cure!_

_I'm gon' be manicured_  
_You wanna be man cured_  
_Ma ma ma manicured_  
_She wanna be man cured_ **_(man-cured!)_**  
_Salon's enough for her_  
_Not to feel so insecure_  
_Ma ma ma manicure_  
_She wanna be take care'n of_  
_Can you feel it, can you feel it, can you feel it_  
_I'm addicted to the love that you garner_ **_(man-cured!)_**  
_Can you feel it, can you feel it, can you feel it_  
_Like a serial killer, man is a goner **(man-cured!)**_

At the end, the entire cafeteria cheers. The ladies take their flourished bows and head offstage. We Alpha guys walk up.

_Fussin' and fightin', we back at it again_  
_I know that, it's my fault, but you don't understand** (no)**_  
_I got memories, this is crazy_  
_You ain't nothing like the girl I used to know_  
_Good with ma, good with pa, cool with all my niggas_  
_I should try, truth is I wanna let u in, but **(no)**_  
_Damn these memories, and it's crazy_  
_You ain't nothing like the girl I used to know_

_Girl I really wanna work this out, cause I'm tired of fightin'_  
_And I really hope you still want me the way I want you_  
_I said I really wanna work this out, damn girl I'm tryin'_  
_It's no excuse, no excuse_  
_But I got this-_

_I got this icebox where my heart used to be** (but I got this)**_  
_I got this icebox where my heart used to be** (said I got this)**_  
_I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold_  
_I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold._

_I got this icebox where my heart used to be **(but I got this)**_  
_I got this icebox where my heart used to be **(said I got this)**_  
_I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold_  
_I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold._

_Why can't I get it right,_  
_Just can't let you go.  
__I opened up, she let me down,  
__I won't feel that no more **(no)**  
__I got memories. This is crazy.  
__She ain't nothing like the girl I used to know.  
__I don't mean to take it out on you baby,  
__But my heart is in the same ol' condition that baby left it  
__**(And I)** I apologize for making you cry,  
__Look me in my eyes and promise you won't do me the same._

_Girl I really wanna work this out, cause I'm tired of fightin'_  
_And I really hope you still want me the way I want you_  
_I said I really wanna work this out, damn girl I'm tryin'_  
_It's no excuse, no excuse_  
_But I got this-_

_I got this icebox where my heart used to be **(but I got this)**_  
_I got this icebox where my heart used to be **(said I got this)**_  
_I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold_  
_I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold._

_I got this icebox where my heart used to be** (but I got this)**_  
_I got this icebox where my heart used to be **(said I got this)**_  
_I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold_  
_I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold._

_I don't wanna be stuck up in this cold, cold world,_  
_Don't wanna mess this up, better keep your eye on me girl.  
__I don't wanna be stuck up in this cold, cold world,  
__Don't wanna mess this up, better keep your eye on me girl.  
__Don't wanna mess this up, better keep your eye on me girl.  
__Don't wanna mess this up, better keep your eye on me girl.  
__Don't wanna mess this up, better keep your eye on me girl._

_Girl I really wanna work this out, cause I'm tired of fightin'_  
_And I really hope you still want me the way I want you_  
_I said I really wanna work this out, damn girl I'm tryin'_  
_It's no excuse, no excuse_  
_But I got this-_

_I got this icebox where my heart used to be **(but I got this)**_  
_I got this icebox where my heart used to be** (said I got this)**_  
_I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold_  
_I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold._

_I got this icebox where my heart used to be **(but I got this)**_  
_I got this icebox where my heart used to be **(said I got this)**_  
_I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold_  
_I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold, I'm so cold._

If I wasn't cosplaying as Dirk, I would be blushing madly right now.

The crowd cheers and Jake and I, once off stage, hurry to our changing room to 'go Trickster'.

We return just as the Beta guys are finishing up their performance.

"And meow, if we're all really loud, I bet Dirk will do a solo purrfurmance!" Nepeta bounces excitedly. A single light falls on me and my Trickster'ed friends jump and clap with glee. "Go Dirk! You can do it!" they chorus, to which I flip them the bird.

"C'mon, let's hear it!" Nepeta cheers. Everyone starts to applaud and cheer. I hold a hand to to my ear, and they get louder. But I wave them off, turning to leave. That's when they burst into an all-out, riot-like roar. I stop, slowly turning to them, and give a single nod.

The music begins to play and seven others take the stage- each dressed like on of the Mane 6 MLP characters plus Discord.

_I'm not a fan of puppeteers,_  
_But I've a nagging fear_  
_Someone else is pulling at the strings._

_Something terrible is going down_  
_Through the entire town,_  
_Wreaking anarchy and all that it brings!_

_I can't sit idly,_  
_No I can't move at all!_  
_I curse the name-_  
_The one behind it all~!_

_Discord, I'm howling at the moon,_  
_And sleeping in the middle_  
_Of a summer afternoon._  
_Discord, whatever did we do_  
_To make you take our world away?_  
_Discord, are we your prey alone?_  
_Or are we just a stepping stone_  
_For taking back the throne?_  
_Discord, we won't take it any more,_  
_So take your tyranny away!_

_(Disco-o-oo-o-oo-ooo-oo-rd) x3_

_I'm fine with changing status quo,_  
_But not in letting go,_  
_Now the world is being torn apart._  
_A terrible catastrophe_  
_Played by a symphony,_  
_What a terrifying work of art!_

_I can't sit idly,_  
_No, I can't move at all!_  
_I curse the name-_  
_The one behind it all~!_  
_Discord, I'm howling at the moon,_  
_And sleeping in the middle_  
_Of a summer afternoon._  
_Discord, whatever did we do_  
_To make you take our world away?_

_Discord, are we your prey alone?_  
_Or are we just a stepping stone_  
_For taking back the throne?_  
_Discord, we won't take it any more,_  
_So take your tyranny away!_

_(Disco-o-oo-o-oo-ooo-oo-rd) x8_

_Discord, I'm howling at the moon,_  
_And sleeping in the middle_  
_of a summer afternoon._  
_Discord, whatever did we do_  
_to make you take our world away?_

_Discord, are we your prey alone?_  
_Or are we just a stepping stone_  
_for taking back the throne?_  
_Discord, we won't take it any more,_  
_so take your tyranny away!_

The song ends with me slicing off Discord's head with my katana, and everyone cheers- well, mainly the other Trickster'd Alpha humans, but whatever. I stalk offstage and My Jake throws himself at me, giggling madly like the crazy British freak he is.

I return to the Real Alphas, and they look rather nervous. "Uh..." Real Jake begins.

"Dirk!" Two arms wrap around my neck. "Silly rascal, absconding when there are babies to be made! Come along!" Cosplay Jake tries to tug me away. He looks at Real Dirk. "Two Dirks to make babies with? Oh, jolly good fun!" Cosplay Jake reaches for Real Dirk, but I grab his arm, twisting it behind his back. "Oh, Dirk, I didn't know you were such a sadist, naughty chum." Trickster Jake giggles hysterically, squirming a bit playfully.

I look to Real Dirk. "I can only feel pity for ya." With that, I take the green and orange fluff of sunshine and giggles away.

* * *

My cell rings as I finish washing off the Trickster make-up. "Howdy." I answer as I dry my face.

"Hey, Lucy!" Jane's voice comes to my ear.

"Is something wrong, Jane?" I inquire worriedly._ 'How the fuck did she get my number?'_

"Oh, no, not really. All of us are having a gathering at the Peixes house and we wanted you to come over!" she explains happily.

"Er, what time?" I inquire carefully.

"About an hour." she answers. _'ARE YOU SERIOUS?!'_

"Um, ok... how about you text me the address and I'll see you guys there?" I suggest. "Yeah, I can do that. See you Lucy!" she giggles. "Bye." I murmur before hanging up. With a sigh, I head to my room.

I change into a seafoam green, gothic lolita dress. I write a quick note saying to just order pizza and that I'll be back late, and grab my keys on the way out to my car...

I pull into the ridiculously long driveway of a three story mansion and feel the slightest tickle of dread upon my spine. The sick feeling is like the feathers from the wings of death brushing against my back.

Hesitantly, I knock on the door and Meenah answers, her angry glare vanishing when she realizes it's just me. "Hey Lucy. C'mon in." she gives a big grin, her teeth slightly pointed. I give her a small smile in return and step inside.

As expected, the furniture is modern and everything is in light shades of pink. Both Alphas and Ancestors (minus adult Dave and co.) are present.

"Luthy!" Mituna cries happily, rushing over and hugging me tightly. "Yes, yes. Hello again, Mituna." I give my small smile as I hug him back awkwardly.

"Hey, who owns the sweet Impala in the drive?" Dirk asks as he and Roxy walk in the front door.

"My Impala? Is something wrong with it?" I ask worriedly. Everyone blinks at me. "No. Just wanted to know who it belongs to." Strider explains nonchalantly, moving to sit on one of the many couches.

"Luthy!" Mituna pulls me to sit between him an Psii, cuddling close to me. _'Gosh, I feel awkward yet safe at the same time.'_

Everyone enjoys each other's company, and I feel really out of place.

"Er, Lucy," Kankri pipes up, "I've, uh, been meaning to ask you something- i-if it's not triggering or anything." He tries to amend. I merely raise a curious eyebrow. "Oh?" I ask politely. "Go ahead. I promise I won't be triggered." I assure him.

He nods shyly. "W-well, you're the only... person who takes our actions and dialect in stride while everyone else looks at us like were crazy." he explains. "Why is that?" he leans forward in his seat just a bit.

I blink. "Do you know who you guys are? Well, whom you look like?" I turn the tables. When no one answers, I stand from my place between the Captors and walk over to the computer. I type and click and scroll a little bit before leaning back in the chair. "Look." I command. Almost everyone comes to look over my shoulder.

I had started at Act 4, so they murmur to each other over Karkat. "He has my last name?!" Kankri cries. Signless takes a bit more interest.

"This generation of what we call 'trolls' will help the children of Dirk Strider, Jake English, Jane Crocker, and Roxy Lalonde to undo- or rather try not to do- what they originally did to screw up Karkat's team's session." I speak quietly. "Everything in this story is paradoxal."

I turn to Cronus, who happens to be closest to me. "Your generation are called the Dancestors." I gesture to the computer. "You are also referred to as the Alpha trolls." I turn to Condescense. "You're generation is called the Ancestors, whom are divided and at war with each other." I take a breath. "But that can't be, or maybe it's going to be. Perhaps it's already happened and will happen again... I'm not sure. But you guys are best represented here." I point to the screen.

"And here I thought we were doing so well!" Kankri huffs dramatically.

"But it does explain the cosplay today..." Meenah begins thoughtfully.

"What 'cosplay'?" Dolorosa demands, Handmaid perking up at the word.

"A bunch of us humans were dressed as the Alpha and Beta trolls and humans." I answer calmly.

"So... it the secret out?" Kankri asks a little fearfully. To this I raise a single eyebrow. "Unless y'all are the trolls in disguise, there_ is_ no secret." I reply flatly.

Everyone's quiet for a moment before Meenah steps up to me. She runs a hand through her short front hair, her skin darkening to the signature grey. Her ears begin to point and her teeth sharpen considerably. Fuchsia eyes smirk at me as her Pieces-shaped horns appear. "No hiding it now." she shrugs.

Slowly, all the Alphas and Ancestors reveal their true selves. '_Ohfuckohfuckohfuckohfuck! I feel a fangirl moment coming on!'_

"Do you have some sort of inhuman power of prophetic lines?" Condescense sniffs coldly. Wow, she must not like me.

"Erm, not exactly..." I fidget. "I'm a... a psychic, I guess you could say. I teach meditation on occasion and help people with mental and physical blocks and such. My sister is more of the telepathy, or chucklevoodoos, and telekinesis, moving things with only her mind." I explain carefully.

Mituna is the first to speak, suddenly standing beside me. "Luthy fikth head?" he gasps excitedly, pointing to him own cranium. I give a small, sad smile. "Well, yeah, I could. But it's not that simple, Tuna." I try to explain.

"Luthy help! Fikth head!" Tuna points to his head again, and my smile falls. _'How do I say no?'_ "Er, Tuna, I'm not sure... I've never dealt with psiioniics, let alone an Alternian..." I speak up unsurely.

"If you can truly do what you claim, than fix that Captor." Condescense demands, and ominously looming GHB at her shoulder, his red eyes daring me to disobey. With a small sigh, I rise. "Okay." I turn to the Helmsman. "I'm going to need your help, Psii." I tell the Ancestor as I gently take Mituna by the hand and walk back into the living room.

Psii, Tuna, and myself sit on the floor as everyone else sits on some seating around us, giving us plenty of space. _'I don't even have my regular materials for focus and mental connection...'_ I think to myself in a brief feeling of melancholy. I have Tuna sit on my right and Psii on my left, all three of us criss-cross. I remove Mituna's helmet. "Close your eyes and empty your minds of everything except my voice." I speak slowly and calmly, as I myself find my meditative state. I activate my chakras, feeling my energy swirl inside me and around my skin.

"Now, I'm going to have to touch you for a complete connection. I'll just touch your faces. Whatever you two feel, do not pull back from it. Psiioniic, don't activate until I give you the okay. Forgive me if it feels like I'm invading your personal space, I am sorta invading your minds." With that I place my left hand on Psii's right cheek and my right hand on Tuna's left. My eyes drift close.

I start with Mituna, gently picking and poking around as carefully as I can. I'm not completely sure what I'm looking for until I find it; a thin, blackened thing. This muscle must be responsible for Tuna's psiioniics. "Okay, I found it Tuna. Now I'm going to keep part of my in you as I move to Psii. Please don't move or resist." I carefully take hold of the dead muscle, keeping my hold on it as I mostly pull out of Mituna's mind and gently delve into Psii's.

There are sparks of psiioniics everywhere. Maybe I should have done Psii first. It's much more difficult to navigate and maneuver than Tuna's mind. Each little zap is like a shot in my brain every time I accidentally brush a spark.

But then I find it- and in the same area as where I found Tuna's/ It's the most active muscle here glowing in dual blue and red. I take a deep breath. "Okay, Psii, I found it. When I give the word, I want you to turn on your psiioniics as high as they'll go... And... now!" I speak as I grab the muscle. As planned, Psii activates his powers and I am immediately filled with thousands of fine needles shredding my insides. But instead of trying to contain such crazy energy, I let it flow into Tuna's muscle. Slowly, the thing starts to regenerate. _'Almost there.'_ I don't know if my body spoke through the pain, but the determined feelings I get from the Captors' minds lets me know that at least they heard me.

My body feels like a burning, icy fire is running rampant and is simultaneously melting and freezing my organs. My mind is filled with red and blue static like 'white noise'. But it's done now; Mituna's muscle is completely healed. I gently begin to pull away, and find myself stuck. Tunas consciousness is holding me fast in his mind, connected to his psiioniics.

"Tuna," I speak through clenched teeth, "please let go." There's a sense of 'no' echoing in his mind. The psiioniics suddenly up in power, making my pain worse. I'm on the verge of a black-out. "Mituna, let go." I grind out harshly. But the psiioniics suddenly ramp up again, and I vaguely hear the shriek of pain that rips from my already hoarse throat.

I am blessed with the briefest moment of painless bliss before blacking out.

* * *

3rd POV

The next day finds the Alphas at school with no Lucy. Mituna is the only one bouncing happily. "What's got _you_ so perky, Tuna?" Cronus grunts, looking up from his biology book.

"He just got his psiioniics back, Cronus. He's just excited." Porrim assures the Ampora.

"Well, that and Thii ith home with Luthy." Mituna smiles. Latula raises an eyebrow. "What does that have to do with anything, Mituna?" Porrim asks politely.

Mituna breaks into a goofy grin. "Luthy and Thii are gonna get together!" At this, everyone proceeds to perform the Facepalm Combo 2X -all except Dirk, whose hands ball into fists, unseen, under the table.

"Er, Mituna, how could you possibly _know_ such a thing?" Kankri inquires nervously.

"Luthy ith like Thii! They're perfect for eatth other!" The young Captor exclaims happily. Everyone performs the Facepalm Combo 2X again.

* * *

_**A.N. Okay, so this chapter was extremely long, even by MY standards. Sorry bout that guys. Hope you enjoyed, though! **_**:o)**


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